Have you ever wondered how the way parents raise their kids can affect their fears? A study published in Health Psychology Research looked at how separation anxiety is linked to different parenting styles in 300 kindergarten children in Amman, Jordan.
Separation anxiety happens when young kids feel very upset or worried when away from their parents. The researcher wanted to find out if some parenting styles can make kids more or less likely to have these worries.
The study found that children who experienced harsh, overprotective, or neglectful parenting were more likely to have higher levels of separation anxiety. On the other hand, children whose parents followed a “normal” or balanced parenting style had lower levels of anxiety.
These findings matter because separation anxiety can be stressful for both children and their families. Knowing that a parenting style can affect a child’s anxiety shows how parents’ behaviors matter.
Understanding the Research
The researcher studied 300 kindergarten children in Amman, Jordan. They chose the children randomly from different kindergartens to make sure every child had a fair chance to be part of the study.
To learn about the children’s anxiety, the researcher used a separation anxiety scale, which is a set of 40 questions that check how worried children feel when they are away from their parents.
A parental socialization scale with 57 questions was used to learn about how parents raise their children. These questions measured the following parenting styles:
- Cruelty – parents who punish or threaten their children.
- Overprotection – parents who do everything for their child and don’t let them solve problems on their own.
- Negligence – parents who do not guide or encourage their child.
- Normality – parents who use a fair and encouraging approach with their children.
Before starting the study, experts checked the questions to make sure they were accurate. The researcher also tested the scales with 50 children to make sure the questions were reliable.
After collecting and analyzing the responses, the researcher was able to see clear patterns between parenting styles and separation anxiety:
- 29% had moderate levels of separation anxiety, and 8% had high levels of separation anxiety. Most of the children had low or no anxiety.
- Most parents were overprotective, a smaller number used balanced parenting, and very few were cruel or neglectful.
- Children with cruel, overprotective, or neglectful parents were more likely to have higher separation anxiety. These parenting styles either make children feel unsafe, overly dependent, or unsupported.
- Children with normal or balanced parenting had lower separation anxiety. This is because they receive consistent support, clear rules, and opportunities to be independent.
Practical Strategies for Parents and Caregivers
Understanding your own parenting style is an important first step. Start by becoming more aware of how you respond to your child’s needs and emotions, then focus on helping them learn to manage their feelings on their own.
Encourage small steps of independence
Let your child try new tasks on their own, like putting on their shoes, packing their backpack, or helping with a simple chore. These are great opportunities for them to build confidence.
Remember to give support without taking over. If you see your child struggle, offer encouragement or break the task into manageable steps. Focus on their perseverance.
Be aware of your parenting style and the messages you send
How you react, the rules you set, and the way you offer support all send signals to your child about handling emotions.
Using an authoritative or balanced parenting style helps. This approach teaches them that it’s okay to have worries while giving them the tools to manage their feelings on their own.
Manage your own anxiety.
Kids are highly sensitive to their parents’ emotions. A parent who is visibly anxious, worried, or stressed can make their child feel more anxious, even if the parent’s worry is unrelated to the child’s situation.
Make time for rest, exercise, healthy meals, or activities that help you relax. If you feel overwhelmed, step away briefly before responding to your child. This shows your child that it’s possible to face challenges positively.
Practice gradual separations.
Separation anxiety can be reduced by gradually letting your child spend time away from you. You can begin with short periods with a trusted adult (like a friend or relative) while you stay nearby for reassurance.
As your child becomes more comfortable, gradually increase the time you are away. During each separation, remind your child that you will return. You can also have your child bring a small comfort item, like a favorite toy or blanket, to help them feel secure.
The researcher suggests running awareness campaigns to help parents learn about healthy and balanced parenting and how to apply it in daily life.
We invite you to check out our Anxiety Worksheets for kids and teens who need tools to cope. Our collection includes an anxiety thermometer, checklists, and strategies for managing different types of anxiety.
