Research on How Kids and Teens Cope with Stress and Difficult Feelings

A study published in BMC Public Health examined how children and teens cope with stress and upsetting emotions.

The researchers conducted group interviews with 44 children in Sweden, aged 10 to 14, at four schools. They wanted to learn directly from the children about what helps them feel better when they’re having a hard time emotionally.

The study found three main ways kids cope:

First, many said it helps to accept their feelings and talk about them. Second, doing activities they enjoy — like spending time with pets or being in nature — made them feel good. Third, they looked for help from people they trust, such as friends, parents, teachers, or school counselors.

This research matters because it tells us what children need to feel better.

Understanding the Research

The goal of the study was to understand how children and teens deal with stress and challenging emotions in their daily lives.

To do this, the researchers visited four schools and spoke with 44 students in small group interviews. These groups were made up of both boys and girls who already knew each other from school. Each group had about 4 to 8 students, so everyone had a chance to talk and share their thoughts.

Before the interviews, the students joined a school health program that discussed physical and mental health. This included learning about nutrition, sleep, stress, and dealing with big emotions.

After the program, the researchers asked them open-ended questions, such as:

• “When you feel sad, down, stressed, anxious, what are some common ways you try to manage those feelings?”
• “Are there specific activities, strategies, or people you turn to for support?”

The researchers made sure everyone felt comfortable and had a chance to speak, even the quieter students. Following the interviews, they listened to the recordings and looked for common ideas. They sorted these into main themes.

Here’s what the researchers found:

• Accepting and expressing feelings - The students said it’s important to accept their feelings and find ways to express them, such as talking to someone or writing in a journal. They also noticed that people usually hide how they really feel, and that boys, especially, may feel pressure to stay silent about their emotions.
• Doing things that make you feel good - They mentioned that fun or relaxing activities — like playing, creating art, or spending time with loved ones helped them feel better and take a break from stress. While these distractions didn’t solve their problems, they gave them time and space to cope in the moment.
• Seeking help - Many of them turn to trusted people like parents, friends, or teachers for support, but some are afraid that speaking up might worsen the situation. Friends were easier to talk to, while pets were comforting when no one else felt safe. Boys, in particular, felt pressure to hide their emotions, but they still believed in helping friends who were having a hard time.

Practical Strategies for Parents and Caregivers

This study gives us powerful insights straight from kids themselves — but how can we, as parents and caregivers, use this knowledge in everyday life? Here are ways we can support their mental health at home:

Use “low-pressure” moments for emotional check-ins

Low-pressure moments are everyday situations where your child is distracted in a good way or not expecting a serious conversation. Think: walking somewhere together, baking side by side, or snuggling before bed.

You can ease into the conversation by using open, casual questions or observations like: “What made you smile today? Was there anything that made you frown?” or “I noticed you seemed kind of quiet after school. Want to talk about it?”

Let them have time for unstructured play and hobbies

This means giving them the freedom to choose activities they enjoy without a set outcome. It could look like building forts out of blankets or drawing just for fun!

To get started, try protecting pockets of time during the day or week where your child is not expected to be “on task.” Turn off screens and guide them toward something open-ended. Ask: “You’ve got the afternoon free — want to set up a Lego world or paint outside?”

Be emotionally available without overwhelming them

Some parents, often out of deep love and concern, may unintentionally come on too strong. The key is to be present, not dominant. Be there to listen and support them without pushing too hard or even trying to fix things right away.

Make sure they know you’re there for them if they want to talk. In fact, you can simply sit together without demanding a conversation. Recognize that sometimes, children process things quietly or may need space first.

We don’t yet know how certain strategies work over time, but this study makes one thing clear: young people need to be part of the conversation about emotional health. Their voices can help improve future research.

Give your child tools to manage stress in healthy ways. Start with our Coping Skills Worksheets.