Grief Counseling for Children

Losing someone they love can be one of the hardest experiences a child faces. Grief counseling for kids can give children a safe place to talk about their feelings and ask questions.

Family support helps many children cope with loss. Some children, however, need additional support to adjust after a death. Grief counseling does not take away the sadness, but it can help children find comfort as they move through the grieving process.

If you’re wondering whether grief counseling is right for your child, this guide can help. It explains what grief counseling is, when it may be helpful, what happens during counseling sessions, and how to find the right support.

What Is Grief Counseling?

Grief counseling is a type of support that helps children cope after someone they love dies. A trained counselor gives children a safe place to talk, ask questions, and share feelings such as sadness, anger, fear, or confusion.

The goal of grief counseling is not to make a child “get over” their loss or stop feeling sad. Instead, it helps children understand their emotions and develop healthy coping skills.

Through counseling, they learn to adjust to life after the loss and continue to feel connected to the person who died through healthy memories.

Research suggests that grief counseling can help children who are having a difficult time coping after a loss. A review of 27 studies found that grief support had positive effects, especially for children with stronger grief symptoms [*].

When Does a Child Need Grief Counseling?

Many children slowly adjust after the death of a loved one with the help of caring family members and friends. However, some children need extra support.

Grief counseling may be helpful when a child’s grief becomes overwhelming or lasts for a long time. It may also be needed if their grief begins to affect their daily life, relationships, or sense of safety.

Consider talking to a grief counselor if your child:

• Feels deeply sad, worried, or angry for many weeks without improving.
• Withdraws from family, friends, or favorite activities.
• Has trouble at school, such as poor grades, difficulty concentrating, or refusing to attend.
• Shows unexpected behavior changes, such as becoming very clingy, using baby talk, or having toileting accidents.
• Has unexplained physical problems, such as headaches or stomachaches.
• Blames themselves for the death or says, “It’s my fault.”
• Avoids talking about the loss or becomes very upset when it is mentioned.
• Talks about wanting to die or seems hopeless. (Seek immediate help from a mental health professional or emergency services.)

Children may need extra support after a sudden or traumatic death or if they have experienced multiple losses. Counseling may also help if the loss has led to major changes at home, such as moving or changes in caregivers.

What Happens During Grief Counseling Sessions?

Every child experiences grief differently, so no two counseling sessions are the same.

A grief counselor gets to know your child’s age, personality, developmental stage, relationship with the person who died, and unique experiences. They then choose activities and conversations that best meet your child’s needs.

Younger children may draw, play, tell stories, or use puppets and books to share their feelings. Older children and teens often feel more comfortable talking, journaling, creating memory projects, or practicing coping skills.

A counselor may also help your child:

• Understand that grief is a normal response to loss.
• Identify and name different emotions.
• Learn healthy ways to cope with sadness, anger, worry, or guilt.
• Ask questions about death in a safe environment.
• Remember the person who died through stories, photos, or memory activities.

A trained grief counselor follows your child’s pace and never forces them to share more than they are comfortable with. Grief counseling works best when it is developmentally appropriate.

Types of Grief Counseling for Children

Some children feel more comfortable meeting one-on-one with a grief counselor. Individual counseling provides a quiet, supportive space where they can talk about their feelings. A child gets to ask questions and learn healthy ways to cope.

Depending on their age and preferences, activities may include talking, drawing, play, storytelling, journaling, or memory projects.

Other children find comfort in group grief counseling, where they meet peers who have also experienced the death of someone they love. Hearing other children's stories can help them realize they are not alone in their feelings.

One study found that many bereaved children felt isolated from their peers after the death of a loved one. Children who attended a peer support group said meeting others with similar experiences helped them feel less alone. These groups supported their ability to cope with grief [*].

Sometimes, the entire family benefits from family grief counseling. Since grief affects everyone differently, family sessions give parents and children a chance to share their feelings. Family members can also better understand what each person is going through [*].

If a child’s loss was sudden, violent, or especially traumatic, a counselor may recommend a trauma-informed approach. These therapies help children process both the grief and any frightening memories connected to the death.

Grief counseling can include several approaches rather than following one set method. Counselors choose strategies that match the child’s age, grief experience, and individual needs.

How Long Does Grief Counseling Usually Last?

The length of grief counseling is different for every child. Some may need support for a few weeks or months, while others attend for longer, depending on their symptoms, needs, and experience with loss.

Research shows that grief programs for children can vary widely in length. A 2024 review found that the programs studied ranged from 1 to 21 sessions [*].

Another clinical trial for children and teens with prolonged grief used nine individual sessions, along with five sessions for parents or caregivers [*].

Keep in mind that these numbers are not a timeline for grief. Your child’s counselor may change the treatment plan based on their progress and needs. Some children also return for extra support when special dates (such as holidays or birthdays) or new life events bring up grief again.

How to Find the Right Grief Counselor for Your Child

Start by looking for a licensed mental health professional who has experience working with grieving children and teens. Ask about their training, the ages they usually work with, and the grief counseling methods they use.

Your child’s pediatrician, school counselor, or a local bereavement organization may also be able to recommend trusted professionals.

The right counselor should help your child feel comfortable, respected, and safe. Pay attention to how the counselor communicates with both you and your child and whether their approach fits your child’s age and needs.

It may take time for your child to open up, but if the counselor does not seem like a good fit, it’s okay to consider another provider.

Grief Counseling Centers

Finding grief support for your child can feel like a big task, but you do not have to search alone. The following U.S.-based organizations provide grief support programs for children and families or can help you find services:

• Dougy Center - Dougy Center provides peer grief support and resources for children, teens, young adults, and their families.
• Judi’s House - Judi’s House offers no-cost grief services for children, young adults, and families, including group and short-term counseling.
• Experience Camps - Experience Camps is a national nonprofit that offers free summer camps and other in-person programs where grieving children can connect.
• National Alliance for Children’s Grief Find Support Directory (NACG) - NACG helps families search for grief programs and services by location, age group, and type of support.

Resources

Learning more about childhood grief can help you feel better prepared to answer questions and support your child at home. These trusted resources offer guides and other tools:

• American Academy of Pediatrics
• Dougy Center
• National Alliance for Children’s Grief Support Resource Library
• Sesame Workshop